I’ve written about my love of Terry Pratchett and my opinion on Michael Sheen as an actor and a human being. The two combine in the TV series based on the book Good Omens, which Pratchett cowrote. The third installment is out now. How did Good Omens 3 shape up?

Not very well.

Good Omens: a personal history

Good Omens was one of the first books I bought in hardback. My £9 gamble paid off, it’s a fantastic book co-authored by two men who were reaching the height of their abilities. The book, published in 1990, came at the beginning of Pratchett’s golden era and not long into Gaiman writing his breakthrough work, the graphic novel Sandman. It was several years in the making as the two men nurtured their solo careers.

The story follows at least three strands. The focus for many is the relationship between the angel Aziraphale and the demon Crowley (né Crawley). Left on Earth at the beginning of time, Aziraphale gives Adam and Eve his flaming sword to keep them warm after they are cast out of the Garden of Eden. Crowley provided the temptation that resulted in their expulsion. Fast forward six thousand years and the two have established a working relationship and something of a friendship. They describe it as being like the relationship of the representatives of two rival companies. Stationed far from head office, they help each other out when it is mutually beneficial.

In the late 1970s Crowley delivers the Antichrist to the hospital at Tadfield Manor, where he will be swapped with the son of an American diplomat. The plan (part of God’s ineffable plan) is for the Antichrist to grow up close to the seat of world power. By the time he turns 14, he will have become a powerful entity and help bring about Armageddon. However, a mix-up with the babies means that the Antichrist, named Adam, is raised in Lower Tadfield, a small village in rural England. In the second strand we follow Adam as the leader of ‘Them’, a group of four kids who get up to all sorts of japes and have a generally wizard time.

The third strand is the story of Newton Pulsifer, an apprentice witchfinder, and Anathema Device, a witch. Device is a direct descendant of Agnes Nutter, whose prophecies are staggeringly accurate, if a little cryptic at times¹. Newton is a direct descendant of the man² who burned Agnes at the stake. Device is in Tadfield looking for the Antichrist. Pulsifer is in Tadfield because there are odd goings-on in the area and there may be witches. They meet, fall in lust, and agree to work together.

The three strands meet at the American airbase near Tadfield, where Armageddon is to be triggered. Pulsifer uses his negative computer skills to prevent the launch of a devastating nuclear weapon release set in motion by Death, War, Famine, and Pollution³. Adam confronts Satan and refuses to let the Earth be destroyed. Satan insists on the destruction of the world – it’s in the Plan. But the question arises: Maybe the world not being destroyed is part of the Plan. How can you know? It’s ineffable.

The first series

After publication there was a lot of discussion about a Good Omens film or TV series. The Pythons Terry Gilliam and Terry Jones were independently linked to film (Johnny Depp and Robin Williams as stars) and TV adaptations, respectively, but it came to nothing. A BBC Radio adaptation in 2014 did a good job, with Mark Heap as Aziraphale Peter Serafinowicz as Crowley, and a cameo from Terry and Neil, recorded in Neil’s car.

Terry Pratchett died in 2015 after a long and public fight with Alzheimer’s disease. After his death, Gaiman received a letter from Terry urging him to see the much-delayed television project through.

The first series came out in 2019. This was the first time that Michael Sheen and David Tennant had worked together. Previously, they had been up for the same roles, given that they are of a similar age and are both among the best character actors in the country. There’s usually only one such role available in any project, so it’s one or the other⁴. Or maybe Sam West, John Simm, Benedict Cumberbatch⁵, Ewan McGregor… any reasonably good-looking, high class British actor born in 1970 ± 5 years.

It is the onscreen chemistry of the two leads that shines. They inhabit the characters as any good actors would, adding little touches that distinguish the basic character of the two.

The series follows the book very closely, adding some excellent historical scenes (Crowley getting credit for the French Revolution stands out) and leaves very little out. I think only the lesser Bikers of the Apocalypse are omitted⁶.

There is a deep friendship offscreen too, as witnessed by their lockdown project Staged. The rest of the cast shine as well. Miranda Richardson, Michael McKean, John Hamm, Doon Mackichan, and Jack Whitehall are just some of those who shine. The Them are also really good – it can be so hard to get decent child actors.

So it was a big tick, VG, gold star for this. Like the book, it was lively, funny and engaging. A second series, billed as a bridge between the published book and the grand finale, came out in 2023. Some of the ideas that Pratchett and Gaiman discussed for a follow-up⁷ were to be included.

Good Omens 2

This was very much a curate’s egg. I loved the ‘minisodes’ that started some episodes. Harking back to one of the highlights of the first series, we see Crowley in an succession of bad wigs and dodgy facial hair (see below) dealing with Job, graverobbers and Nazi zombies.

In the modern day we have a selection of people local to Aziraphale’s bookshop who pursue love in all its various guises. In heaven, the Archangel Gabriel has gone missing. So too has the archdemon Beelzebub.

The modern-day parts felt a bit flat. Gabriel turns up in Aziraphale’s bookshop with his memory wiped. Over the series, we find out what he’s been up to and why Beelzebub is also missing – they have fallen in love. With Gabriel angelus non grata in heaven, Aziraphale is convinced to take over as chief archangel to prepare for the Second Coming.

Crowley pleads with Aziraphale to stay on Earth. They kiss, but Aziraphale leaves anyway. The series ends, teasing the finale and the Second Coming as heaven and hell fight one last battle. Again.

Neil Gaiman leaves the project

In 2024, several news outlets published a series of sexual assault allegations against Gaiman. This inevitably affected the production of anything that he was involved with, including the second series of Sandman, a Disney adaptation of The Graveyard Book, and the third series of Good Omens. Gaiman left the Good Omens project in October 2024. Amazon reduced the planned six episode series to a single film, with Gaiman credited as writing the film, but he was not the show runner as he had been for the first two series.

Without Gaiman at the helm it would be hard to capture the essence of Good Omens. We read the news with great disappointment, mainly directed at Gaiman’s reported behaviour. However great an artist is, misconduct of this type cannot be erased by their works.

Good Omens 3

The bridging season was a bridge to nowhere. While I was watching it, I felt that I was only watching it so that I had watched it, rather than enjoying it. I don’t ever feel the need to complete a series that I’m no longer enjoying. For example, I haven’t watched much Red Dwarf after series 7, because the quality took a dip after Rob Grant left the writing partnership.

It opened with a scene set at the aftermath of the first Great Battle. Michael Sheen – General Aziraphale – appears dressed in a wig and armour that look repurposed from a Game of Thrones/ Highlander crossover. Crowley threatens him, tries to steal the Flaming Sword, but collapses from the injury he sustained in the battle. Aziraphale, being an angel, puts a bandage he had handy on Crowley’s leg about 6 inches above the wound. He then leaves.

This opening didn’t give me a warm, fuzzy feeling about the next 90 minutes.

It is clear that the film was supposed to be a series. We had Jesus, but not much of Him. His disciple, Harry the Fish, could have supported an entire episode but we got a few minutes of three card monte, the miracle of the pizza and not a lot else.

Some of the scenes felt rushed and yet also slow. Michael’s descent to madness just seemed to happen, rather than giving Doon Mackichan a script to show how Michael’s position as a war angel meant she was eager for conflict and Aziraphale thwarted her ambitions. Maybe the clues were there, but I’d have to watch it again to find out and honestly, I don’t think I can.

In keeping with the theme from the second series, the love story between Crowley and Aziraphale gets played out in a coda to the film. We see them as humans who fall in love and have a happy life together. This felt like fan service.

The film’s best bits were when Sheen and Tennant were onscreen together. But even these failed to lift the film, which became the Sheen and Tennant Show, rather than Good Omens. Most disappointing of all, it wasn’t funny.

What we were given was a Temu version of Staged, the hilarious and lively lock-down series where Sheen and Tennant shout at each other⁸ via video calls. Go and watch it, it’s ace.

In summary

I would heartily recommend the book and the first series. The first series was a rare adaptation that lifted the source material and made it fit the new medium. The second and third installations felt more like fulfilling an obligation, like the second and third Matrix films, rather than completing the arc, as the second and third Lord of the Rings films did.

1. The book is subtitled “The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch”. ↩︎
2. Witchfinder General Thou-Shalt-Not-Commit-Adultery Pulsifer.  ↩︎
3. The four horsemen bikers of the Apocalypse. ↩︎
4. When Richard Herring interviewed Michael Sheen, Herring described Tennant as “The Scottish you”. ↩︎
5. Who voiced Satan in the series. ↩︎
6. Grievous Body Harm, Cruelty to Animals, Really Cool People and Treading in Dogshit (later renamed People Covered in Fish). They have scenes in the script, but time and budget meant they weren’t included. ↩︎
7. Tentatively titled 668, the Neighbour of the Beast. ↩︎
8. And Samuel L Jackson, Judi Dench, Whoopi Goldberg, Ewan McGregor… a lot of huge stars were available. ↩︎

Public Information Films, short films commissioned by the UK government, were often used as filler during advert breaks on telly. Some were memorable for their catchy tunes, others for the catchphrases and others for the sheer terror they induced in us poor kids.

Catchy tunes

I grew up in the north of Scotland. Far north enough for a trip to Inverness to be ‘going down south’. In the summer a PIF that has been stuck in my head for fifty years was shown during every ad break. It’s a two minute mini-epic about how to drive on single track roads. As soon as that jaunty fiddle started up and young Bill Patterson¹ sung the words ‘along the roads of the north and west/ you’ll find the scenery is the best’ I knew I had two minutes to dash to the kitchen and get a drink of juice.

I have no idea what sort of accent he’s singing in, though.

The tune is something of an ear worm for me; it’ll lodge in my head and is difficult to shift. But at least I know not to park a caravan in a passing place. It’s a great tip for driving around Sussex.

You wouldn’t steal a handbag

Another catchy if irritating tune was the unskippable advert that preceded films on DVD for many years. Over a jarred, beat-heavy tune we were told we wouldn’t steal a handbag, or a car, or a television², but why would you steal a film.

No, I wouldn’t steal a car or a handbag. The only time I’ve watch a pirated film was A Clockwork Orange as a fifth-generation knock-off in 1990. It was almost impossible to watch, the quality was so poor. My excuse is that the film was barred from release in the UK by Anthony Burgess.

This was parodied in The IT Crowd and referenced by Ed Byrne in Different Class. Ed is about to watch the horror film Hostel Part 2 and reacts to the ‘You wouldn’t steal a handbag’ bit:

Don’t fucking tell me what I would and wouldn’t do. You don’t know me. I am drunk at two in the afternoon. In my pants. On my own. About to watch women being tortured to death by paying guests in an underground bunker in Eastern Europe. And you’re telling me I wouldn’t nick a poxy handbag?

Ironically enough, it turns out that the company who produced this film didn’t clear the rights for the music.

Charley says…

There were six films in this series, all about how to stay safe in the terrifying world of 1970s Britain. After the little boy misses out on going off with friends because his mum was busy, she rewards him with a picnic. The cat Charley (voiced by Kenny Everett) summarised the lesson of the film, miaowing loudly while gobbling a fish. Tony translated for us:

Charley says: always tell mummy where you’re going so she knows who you are with.

The catchphrase ‘Charley says’ got a minor revival when The Prodigy sampled this phrase for their 1991 hit Charly. The messages were simple warnings about stranger danger, playing with matches and water safety. Water safety is the subject of one of the more chilling PIFs.

I am the spirit of dark and lonely water

Standing proud as the scariest non-graphic PIF³ is this tale of terror, voiced by Donald Pleasance.

Pleasance wasn’t the only big name to lend their voice to PIFs. John Hurt gave a chilling voiceover to the “AIDS – Don’t die of ignorance” campaign, Bernard Cribbins and Brian Wilde voiced a film about the danger of playing near overhead power lines and flying kites near pylons. In front of the camera, David Prowse – the body of Darth Vader – was the Green Cross Code Man.

Lonely Water stands firmly in that genre of PIF known in the trade as “not mucking about.”

Looking at this PIF again, it’s remarkable how much rubbish there could be strewn around the countryside. Old washing machines, bedsteads, cars… It’s a wonder that poor kid at the end didn’t die of tetanus before he drowned.

1. Who played RP Tyler in Good Omens among many other things. Had to get a Terry Pratchett link in. ↩︎
2. This was the 2000s, when tellies were enormous. So of course I wouldn’t steal a television, who do you think I am, Geoff Capes? ↩︎
3. There was one about playing safe on a farm. Very grim. ↩︎

I have a longer introduction to the idea of carrot cake, and how the modern oil-based cake is a relatively recent innovation. Read all about it here.

This is adapted from another blog. It’s a butter cake like you’d expect to make, but there’s less sugar (because of rationing) and carrots are added for sweetness and moisture.

Oven at 200 °C (gas mark 7). Prepare a 20 cm cake tin.

Rub the fat into the flour until it looks like fine breadcrumbs.

Add the sugar, grated carrot, dried fruit and the egg.

Mix well, adding milk to make the batter a bit more runny.

Bake for 40 to 45 minutes, then cool in the tin for 15 minutes. Allow to cool before eating.

I didn’t ice this. I don’t think they would ice a cake in the war, what with sugar being in short supply.

Judgement

It’s OK. Not as moist as the oil-based carrot cake I made the other day, but an acceptable cake nonetheless. Younger child asked me to make it again, but we agreed on a couple of adjustments. First, add some cinnamon. Second, add some icing. After a brief discussion, we agreed that an orange icing similar to that used for lemon drizzle cake would be the first thing to try.

All of which means two things: One, I’ll be updating this recipe before too long. Two, I’ll have to do a recipe for lemon drizzle cake.

Rationing

Of the six ingredients in this cake, all were rationed in 1943, except flour.

Dried fruit was part of a points system. Each adult got 16 points per month towards non-essential items such as dried fruit, canned goods and biscuits. In 1943, a pound of currants would take up all 16 points for the month.

Ingredient	Adult ration/ week	Used here
Flour	Not rationed
Margerine	4 oz	3 oz
Sugar	8 oz	3 oz
Egg (fresh)	1	1
Egg (dried)	3	not used
Dried fruit	points based	2 oz

I resisted the urge to use dried egg. This is partly because they didn’t have any at Waitrose¹, and mainly because the taste was supposedly revolting².

Flour wasn’t formally rationed during the war, but it wasn’t always easy to come by. Flour and bread were rationed from July 1946 to July 1948, partly due to a dreadful summer ruining wheat crops.

Nutrition Facts
Serving size: slice
Servings: 8
Amount per serving
Calories	249
% Daily Value*
Total Fat 10.1g	13%
Saturated Fat 1.8g	9%
Cholesterol 47mg	16%
Sodium 128mg	6%
Total Carbohydrate 35.4g	13%
Dietary Fiber 1.2g	4%
Total Sugars 12.6g
Protein 4.8g
Vitamin D 4mcg	22%
Calcium 20mg	2%
Iron 2mg	9%
Potassium 111mg	2%

1. The place is going to the dogs, I tell you! ↩︎
2. Esther Rantzen in particular recalled how disgusting the taste of powdered egg was. ↩︎

A new reading of the Anglo-Saxon chronicles has cast doubt on one of the most cherished stories from English history. We learned that, in 1066, King Harold marched 200 miles after the Battle of Stamford Bridge to face William of Normandy¹, the leader of the invasion force, and was ultimately defeated at the Battle of Hastings. But this may not be the case.

Anglo-Saxon England

The battle of Hastings, fought on the 14th October 1066, was a turning point in English history. The previous Anglo-Saxon monarchy, which had reigned since about 450, was ousted in the Norman Conquest. Replacing the monarch wouldn’t normally have been all that interesting, but the successful conquest had further, lasting repercussions in the monarchy, society, and language.

Why did William invade?

The penultimate Anglo-Saxon king was Edward the Confessor. He died childless, which wasn’t necessarily the crisis that might be expected. The Saxon kings were largely elected, albeit from an upper ruling class, and primogeniture wasn’t established. Harold Godwinson was the second son of Godwin of Wessex. He was also the brother-in-law of Edward and had been named successor. However, William of Normandy also had a claim to the throne. He was the first cousin once removed of Edward and therefore eligible to be king. He also had a witnessed oath made by Harold in 1064 that Harold would support William’s claim to the English throne.

When Harold accepted the throne on Edward’s death in January 1066, trouble was inevitable.

The Battle of Stamford Bridge

William wasn’t the only nobleman with a claim to the English throne. Harald III of Norway’s had a less straighforward claim to the English throne² . However, Tostig, Harold’s younger brother, encouraged him to invade and take England by right of conquest.

Harald arrived in early September 1066 with about 300 ships and reinforcements from Orkney and Shetland, then under Norse rule. King Harold, based in London and anticipating an invasion by William of Normandy, brought his army north to meet the Norse invaders. The Battle of Stamford Bridge took place on the 25th September and resulted in a decisive English victory. Although the number of casualties remains unclear, the defeated Norsemen needed just 24 ships to return to Orkney. They went without Harald and Tostig, both of whom died in the battle.

Meanwhile, in Normandy…

William had been planning to invade England all year. Building an invasion force from scratch in under 9 months, he was ready to invade by mid August. What kept him back was a mix of bad weather and fear of the Saxon navy. He finally landed on the 28th September, rapidly established a beachhead and set about building a wooden fort from which to raid the area.

News of the invasion reached Harold, 200 miles away. The Battle of Hastings took place on the 14th of October. Less than three weeks after victory at Stamford Bridge, King Harold was dead, his army defeated and the Saxon rule of England was over.

What’s new?

The story as told to us in school is that Harold reached Stamford Bridge by forced march from London. He won the battle, then force marched back south to meet William at Hastings. Four hundred miles and two battles in the space of a month would have left any army exhausted. No wonder the Saxons lost.

However, a recent re-evaluation of the Anglo-Saxon Chronicles by Prof Tom Licence of the University of East Anglia casts doubt on this story. The ‘forced march’ story stems from a misreading of the Chronicles. According to the Chronicles, the fleet ‘came home’ after blockade duties in the English Channel. This suggested to Victorian historians that Harold disbanded the Saxon navy in the Summer of 1066. Sending the ships to their home ports around the country and freed the militia to bring in the harvest. A lack of ships meant that there was no alternative for Harold but to march to Yorkshire, fight, then march back.

Licence suggests that this is not the case. His interpretation is that the navy relocated to their home port of London; it’s not only the Chronicles that suggest this, but other contemporary sources say that there was an active navy at the time.

So rather than marching 200 miles, Harold took the more sensible option of loading his men on ships and sailing up the coast. After Stamford Bridge, he would have sailed back, possibly with some Norwegian-build ships as booty, and marched on Hastings from London.

King Harold the general

This version of events casts Harold in a different light. Harold’s loss at Hastings may not have been mainly the result of exhaustion. The battle was hard-fought. The invaders had cavalry while the English were mostly infantry, but the numbers were about even³. Harold had stationed his men behind a shield wall at the top of Senlac Hill, making it difficult to attack on horseback.

According to the history it a feigned retreat by the Normans decided the battle. Poor discipline among the Saxons led to them chasing after the cavalry, breaking the shield wall and making a successful cavalry charge possible. Harold died late in the battle, likely killed by a cavalryman though the ‘arrow in the eye’ story has its adherents. William the Conqueror⁴, as he is known, was crowned king on 25th December 1066.

And so the Saxon rule was over and the Norman monarchy began. We are still living with the consequences. King Charles III claims the throne as a descendant of William. Our language changed, to become a weird hybrid of a Germanic language with mostly French vocabulary and Celtic grammar.

What might have been

It’s interesting to speculate on what might have happened if Harald’s invasion had been delayed by a month. William invades in late September, Harold meets them with a fresh army before they have established a beachhead and defeats them. Then he has to ship his army up to Yorkshire to fight an established invasion force of Vikings and disaffected locals and loses. Norway and England form a united kingdom and retain Saxon rule until… when? Who knows.

1. Spoiler: He is known to history as William the Conqueror. ↩︎
2. There was an agreement reached in 1038 between Magnus, the previous King of Norway, and Harthacnut, the king of Denmark and England, that the other would inherit their lands on their death. Harthacnut’s death led to a split in the monarchy with Magnus taking over as King of Denamrk and Edward as King of England. When Magnus died in 1047 Harald took over the claim, which included one of many promises made by Edward that they would be named his successor. At least three such promises were made by Edward. ↩︎
3. Some Norman sources later claimed up to a million English soldiers fought at Hastings against 10,000 Normans. Which is impressive, given the population of England was less than 1.5 million at the time. ↩︎
4. Previously known as William the Bastard. Though not to his face. ↩︎